My Story
My mindfulness journey started at the age of 11 when I entered a Buddhist monastery for one week. This is a traditional custom in my home country Myanmar. First, all my hair was shaved off, a symbol of leaving behind my old self. Then I was wrapped in a maroon robe as a sign of commitment to my new way of life, the path of mindfulness. It was my mother's conviction that I was ripe for Buddhist instruction.
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I had to adjust to a demanding daily schedule of alms collecting, chores, study, and worship. Even though I was growing up in very modest circumstances and my stomach was used to bouts of hunger, the hardest part of a monk's life at that young age was not eating from 12 noon until sunrise the next morning.
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Our day started long before the roosters announced the sunrise. At 3:30 we got ready for our morning meditation session. I tried very hard to be a good novice. However, to my great frustration, my young body often took control of my mind during the 1,5 hours long meditation sessions. I frequently fell asleep. The monks would nudge me back to consciousness, gently knocking my head with their pocket lamps.
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Life outside the monastery was very hard and I rarely felt safe. I found comfort in the monastery. We, the young novices, were not allowed to play. But we would sneak in playful moments while cleaning and fulfilling other daily chores. I felt safe, surrounded by this peaceful community of monks. After my one week was up, it was not easy for me to say goodbye to my new friends, some of whom stayed permanently in the monastery.
Like a souvenir, I adopted a habit in my life outside the monastery. Every time I was stressed about something, I would go to my favorite place, a train overpass, and practice breathing meditation for a few minutes. I later realized that this was the seed from which my mindful practice grew.
The next fork in my path occurred when I was 21. I was a student at the university and struggled with social anxiety and feelings of shame because I came from a poor background.To survive, I cleaned and did household chores for other students and gave French lessons.
During a particularly challenging time I decided to take a break and spend another 10 days in a monastery. This time around what struck me most was how my mindfulness practice allowed me to befriend myself and to have greater self-compassion. I started to catch a glimpse of my inner child, not knowing at the time that was who I was meeting.
Growing up in Myanmar, life can be very tough and stressful. Political instability and societal pressure have led many people to turn to drugs and alcohol as a means of self-medication. I, too, fell into this trap for some years. I tried many times to stop drinking, but to no avail. The pull of my circle of friends and my need to calm my fears were too strong. Until one day I found MY reason to stop drinking! I had known the means to quit for many years: mindfulness practice, but the reason to stop reaching for the bottle had eluded me.
Since that day, I have been practicing mindfulness and have been able to stop drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes. Today, fewer things scare me, and when that old visitor called fear comes knocking, I know how to receive it.
As a certified mindfulness coach, I love to share these techniques with young and old, rich and poor, religious and atheist. I firmly believe in the equality among humankind and the innate kindness of human beings.
I am eternally grateful to be able to share the gift I have received with you.